Stop, Drop & Feel – When You’re Caught In A . . .


tornado of thoughts

I had a wonderful consultation coaching session with a new client today.

We talked about repeating masculine patterns.

We talked about being stuck in our heads.

We talked about a Tornado Of Thoughts.

tornado Stuck in your head

A Tornado Of Thoughts occurs when you’re stuck in masculine mode.

You’re thinking, and not feeling.

This is normally centered around an old pattern of masculine responses that you’ve relied on.

Or an issue that keeps coming up in your relationship or dating situation.

And you can’t stop yourself from handling it the same way.

You keep responding the same way to the same trigger . . . over and over again.

Men trigger our feelings.  They trigger the buried emotions in us!  They trigger the “yuck” in our lives that we try to forget about.

And being triggered is a good thing!  Don’t run from it!  Because our response to triggers is HEALING!

Yes, you get to heal what comes up when you’re triggered!

So this is about working on your “yuck” in the presence of a man who’s triggered you.

When you’re triggered, that’s the time to face the 






All buried or hidden deep inside of you.

When any of these emotions come up in response to something a man has said, done (didn’t do) or caused, YOU GET TO HEAL IT!  Embrace this experience and use it as an opportunity to heal!

tornado of thoughts 2

“Tornado Of Thoughts” =>

When You Can’t Stop thinking
When You Can’t Stop Talking
When You Can’t Get Out Of Your Head
When You Can’t ”Let it Go”
When You Can’t Feel and can only think
When You Keep Repeating The Same Habit
When You’re Arguing
When You’re Negative
When You Can’t Get Into Your Feminine

When you find yourself triggered and caught in a Tornado of Thoughts, remember to:


tornado stop drop feel


  1.  Stop What You’re Doing or Saying.  Just Stop.
  2. Drop Down Out Of Your Thoughts Into Your Body, Where Your Feelings Are. Drop Down Out Of Your Thoughts And Get Into Your Feelings Instead.
  3. Feel What You’re Feeling.  Feel What’s Going On.  Feel Where In Your Body That Feeling Underneath That Disturbing And Persistent Thought Is. What’s the feeling underneath that masculine urge you’re experiencing?  Remember, Your Thoughts Are Masking Your Feelings So You Need To Seek Out Your Feelings Right Now!

There’s No Getting Around It . . .

You need to work through those feelings and know what you’re honestly feeling deep down inside.

This is how you work through your feelings:

Take a deep breath.

Breathe deeply again, pushing your stomach out.  Keep doing this until your stomach feels soft and not tense.

Roll your shoulders.

Let your arms hang at your sides and let their weight pull your shoulders down.
Keep doing this until your shoulders feel soft and not tense.

Sit quietly and reflect on what you’re feeling.
Feel all of your feelings in that moment.
Be honest with yourself about what you’re truly experiencing inside of you.

When you feel one thing, go deeper to see if there’s another feeling under that one.
For example you could feel angry, but going deeper, you could be feeling fear underneath that.

Feel where in your body you’re feeling it.

Say out loud everything you’re feeling and where in your body you feel it.

For example, say “I feel sad.  I feel it in my chest.  This sad feeling makes me feel like crying.

Write down your feelings on your smartphone or in a small book you can keep in your purse

Read over what you wrote about your feelings each night.

The Purpose Of This Tool Is To Get Into Your Feelings And Out Of The Storm Of Thoughts In Your Head

Because It’s In Your Feelings Where The Healing Is Going To Happen.

Getting Into The Feelings Underneath Your Old Patterns And Masculine Responses Is The Only Way To Release Yourself From A Tornado Of Thoughts.

If you want to go more in depth with your personal leaning back practices, then feel free to schedule a 90 minute coaching session with me.





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  1. Rose on January 5, 2017 at 2:36 pm

    I love this advice. Is it a good idea to share these feelings, once they are clear, with your partner or friends or is it best to process everything on your own and remain self contained? I often feel the need to communicate.

    • Tatia on January 11, 2017 at 1:05 am

      Hi Rose:

      You are totally on the right track!
      First you process your feelings, and then you share your truth.
      The point of processing is to get UNDER the feeling.
      If you are upset, then go underneath that feeling and delve into the mixture of feelings involved.
      There’s always a combination of feelings at any given time or situation.
      Once you’ve gone inward like this, you’ll have what feelings you want to share.
      I always suggest starting with the positive first and then expressing whatever else you want to share.

      I hope that helps!



  2. Vanessa on September 15, 2017 at 7:50 pm

    Thanks so much for this advice- this is something that I struggle with so I’m bookmarking this to refer to next time I’m triggered. I love your blog!

    • Tatia on September 15, 2017 at 9:03 pm

      Hi Vanessa:

      So many of us struggle with this so you are in good company 🙂

      I’m glad my blog is helpful and that you like it.
      That makes me smile.



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