When You Want To Make The First Move

feminine energy woman wanting to make the first move circular datingAn Email Question From Anonymous Neighbor: Joey has liked me since the beginning of the year when we met in the laundry room. He washes on Tuesday nights so I always rushed home to do laundry in order to bump into him. I could tell he was interested in me, but all he would do was small talk.  

In April I asked him if he wanted to come to my party because my roommate said he told his friend he wanted to ask me out. Joey has been seeing me romantically ever since my party. He says it is fun to be with me. Whenever I call him he always makes time to talk and we have great conversations.

Lately, when I try to plan time together, he always has other plans. I also noticed that he is always around a new woman who just moved in our building. Whenever the new neighbor is around Joey stops to speak to her, even though she keeps the conversation short.

Suddenly he does not do his laundry on Tuesday nights and he has started jogging in the park instead. He goes jogging nearly every day after work now. Yesterday I saw the new neighbor headed towards the park in her workout clothes and realized that Joey is probably there to get a chance to talk to her.  

I feel like a fool now. Why does this keep happening to me? Why do the men I date like me at first and then pull away like this? I found your blog and read about leaning back. I guess maybe I was not leaning back with Joey because I made the first move but I could tell he liked me and liked my calling him and liked my making plans for us to spend time together which he also clearly liked. How can I avoid this from happening again? Can I lean back and still make the first move with a man who is not moving things along even though I can tell he likes me?

I answered Anonymous Neighbor’s question privately, but I created this blog to help other women who experience this problem:
why a man eventually pulls away when a woman makes the first move in circular dating
Ever wonder why you can’t seem to have a good, loving, happy and long lasting relationship?

Whether he’s your husband, a man you’ve been involved with or you’ve just recently started dating, do you notice that at some point he becomes distant, busy or pulls away and withdraw from you?

Would you like to stop this from happening?

Well you can, and it’s easy to do.

The way to avoid this heartbreak, trigger a man’s emotional connection and stay connected (with a good man) is a love coaching tool called LEANING BACK.


Leaning Back is all about letting a man experience your Feminine Energy rather than your Masculine Energy.


Feminine Energy involves:






and expressing.

feminine woman triggering his emotional desire and connection for you circular dating



Leaning Back is purposely NOT doing anything from your masculine energy when you are interacting with a man.

When you use your masculine energy with a man, he experiences it as a “pushing” energy from you.

Asking him out, offering him your number, calling him, initiating plans with him and other “doing” activities directed at him are all examples of your masculine energy at work (this is different than circular dating).  Your masculine energy never works very well in love and relationships.

Your masculine energy is not what triggers a man’s emotional attraction to you. Your masculine energy is the part of you that is all about getting things done, controlling, thinking, doing, taking action or making decisions (these are all traits that men naturally and instinctively do).

 All of these “doing” actions are considered Leaning Forward, which is acting in your masculine energy (which we need to do at work, with our families and other areas of life where we’re in charge and get things done).  This masculine “doing” energy can ruin your love relationships by pushing a masculine man away or masking the fact that he isn’t emotionally attracted to you.  He wants to experience your feminine energy as a woman (he doesn’t want to experience and is not emotionally attracted to masculine energy).

Leaning Back is about purposely being in your feminine energy when dealing with a man.  

feminine woman showing appreciation to man circular dating


Leaning back avoids this pushing energy from you and allows a man to make an Emotional Connection with you.

Whether or not he emotionally connects with you has a lot to do with his own masculine tendencies and the type of man that he is. 

Some men enjoy the challenge of conquering an assertive woman.  But his urge to “conquer” you does not mean that he wants to connect (stay) with you.  He just wants to experience the thrill of the chase.  While your assertiveness draws him in, it does not trigger a desire in his heart to emotionally connect with you.

When you’re being assertive and making things happen with a man, there’s always the possibility that he could be impressed, enjoy the “fun” of being pursued, feel flattered, turned on or intrigued . . . but he’s not going to feel an emotional connection to you because his heart and natural masculine instincts are not triggered.

He can’t connect with your masculine energy in his heart. If he’s the type of man who wants a long lasting relationship, his heart is attracted to and yearns for feminine energy. By making the first move, it’s very likely that you’re masculine energy is going to cause a connection with his mind, his groins and/or his ego. But not his heart.

feminine woman circular dating his emotional attraction



A man’s emotional and natural flow of masculine energy is drawn and ATTRACTED to the feminine energy he experiences from a woman he is interested in.

– he’s attracted to feminine energy and feels an instinctual pull towards it in his bones

– it causes him to move towards this feminine energy (you), closing up any distance between you and him

– the natural reaction of a man who’s emotionally attracted is to move closer towards the feminine energy to experience it more!

If you are acting from your masculine (leaning forward), how can a man experience your feminine energy?  Do you see how leaning forward can block his attraction to you, especially if you’re not in your feminine energy but acting from your masculine energy?  


Understand that when you lean forward, a man is experiencing masculine energy from you, not feminine energy.

His emotional attraction is based on his experiencing your feminine energy.

If you’re making the first move (using your masculine energy), then you’re not leaning back or allowing him to experience your feminine energy.

Remember, leaning back allows a man to experience your feminine energy, which is what his heart yearns for (and what triggers his emotional attraction and connection to you).

Go more indepth with your feminine energy practices in the ACADEMY.

circular dating academy for feminine energy woman







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